Love, Michelle

“Dear NICU Mama, you may not know it now, but one day you will be a walking letter of hope for the NICU mom who is facing the unimaginable reality of having a medically complex baby. The NICU mom who is keeping up with medical terminology and researching test results, while still healing from birth herself.

The NICU mom who is anxiously awaiting her baby’s diagnosis. The NICU mom who hasn’t been able to hold her baby yet. The NICU mom who is pumping milk in the middle of the night for the baby her body longs for. The NICU mom who is traveling to see her baby. The NICU mom who is coordinating hospital visits around her job. The NICU mom who has other babies at home to care for. The NICU mom that is grieving her birth experience. The NICU mom who is counting down the days until she can leave the hospital one last time, but with her baby snug in their car seat. And the NICU mom who will leave the hospital one last time, but with empty arms.

Mama, you and your baby have a unique journey. This may not be the entrance to the world that you dreamed of for your child, but it is their story and yours. A story that may be filled with both joy and sorrow. A story that may include strength alongside fear. A story that has purpose. You may have days where you wonder how you will keep going, but I hope you will remember the moms who have walked this path before and emerged stronger than ever on the other side.

You will leave the NICU eventually, but the NICU may never leave you. A new mama and baby will take your place when you walk out of those doors, and she may have the same thoughts and feelings you did. She may be fearful while celebrating each small milestone her baby reaches. She may feel uncertain, but hopeful about her baby’s future. She may be wondering how she will be changed as a mother and woman.

Mama, I don’t know who you will become after the NICU, but I do know that you and your baby will leave your mark of hope, love, and strength wherever you go. You never know who your story may touch and the hope it might bring her during those quiet moments while holding vigil over her little miracle.”

Love,
Michelle

More of Michelle + Eden’s NICU Journey:

“Eden Alexandra was born on January 10, 2025. When she was born, she was not breathing, and that was the start of her incredible, joyful, and heartbreaking journey. She was in the NICU for 33 days and fought through a wide array of medical complexities and symptoms. At three weeks of life, we received genetic test results that were positive for Zellweger Spectrum Disorder; a terminal diagnosis. Eden lived earthside for one more week and was able to take her final breath outside, in the children’s park at the hospital, while I held her and her dad held me. This has been a heartbreaking time for us, but we want the world to know that she existed, she was beautiful, we are proud of her, and her life has purpose. I hope that all NICU moms can experience joy alongside the other emotions that come with the NICU. I hope they can know that they are strong, their babies are strong, and there can be light in the darkness. “